To the woman two rows behind us: I know, I know. I’m the uncool peanut-obsessed parent who is wiping everything down in her row, scanning for any speck of peanuts in the seats and in the windows. I know you’re the hip “anti-helicopter” mom who lets her kids do their thing, eat what they want, play what they want. Now, I know I’m annoying the passengers around me by politely instructing the flight attendant that my son has a severe peanut allergy. Here I go, irritatingly requesting that he please refrain from serving peanuts as I discussed with the airline service representative a few weeks prior to the flight. The flight attendant totally gets it, but, yes, you are totally reasonable in rolling your eyes as I read every ingredient on the pretzels they serve on board. Their poor little hands that I’m wiping with a wipe to make sure they’re clean before they eat – I mean come on! I’m totally making my kids crazy, right? They will be co-dependent, anxiety-ridden creatures for the rest of their lives. I get it.
But wait. Is your nine year old’s eye swollen? It looks okay to you? Nope, I’m pretty sure it’s swelling up. Could it be possible that he too has a food allergy? Oh, he actually does have a nut allergy? I think you might want to give him some Benadryl immediately. His lips look a little large too. You’re not carrying any? Please give him some of mine right now if he’s okay taking it. I know it’s really lame to carry it around, but if he doesn’t take it, you might have to administer an even dorkier Epi-Pen if he goes into anaphylactic shock, and his organs start shutting down. Really, he needs it. Now.
Look, the Benadryl’s working for your son. Thank goodness! Did he have anything unusual to eat? Oh yeah, it really is a bother to check those ingredients, especially on something with sooooo many different ones, like that granola bar you picked up at the concession stand right before the flight. Maybe you should take a couple of my Benadryl tablets along with you, just in case that pesky nut allergy interferes with your laid back style. Just in case. Also, if you get around to it, maybe, just maybe pick up a couple of Epi-Pens for yourself. I know it’s not fun to be the “allergy kid,” but it’s a lot better to be the living allergy kid. I promise. Your kid deserves it.To the woman two rows behind us: I know, I know. I’m the uncool peanut-obsessed parent who is wiping everything down in her row, scanning for any speck of peanuts in the seats and in the windows. I know you’re the hip “anti-helicopter” mom who lets her kids do their thing, eat what they want, play what they want. Now, I know I’m annoying the passengers around me by politely instructing the flight attendant that my son has a severe peanut allergy. Here I go, irritatingly requesting that he please refrain from serving peanuts as I discussed with the airline service representative a few weeks prior to the flight. The flight attendant totally gets it, but, yes, you are totally reasonable in rolling your eyes as I read every ingredient on the pretzels they serve on board. Their poor little hands that I’m wiping with a wipe to make sure they’re clean before they eat – I mean come on! I’m totally making my kids crazy, right? They will be co-dependent, anxiety-ridden creatures for the rest of their lives. I get it.
But wait. Is your nine year old’s eye swollen? It looks okay to you? Nope, I’m pretty sure it’s swelling up. Could it be possible that he too has a food allergy? Oh, he actually does have a nut allergy? I think you might want to give him some Benadryl immediately. His lips look a little large too. You’re not carrying any? Please give him some of mine right now if he’s okay taking it. I know it’s really lame to carry it around, but if he doesn’t take it, you might have to administer an even dorkier Epi-Pen if he goes into anaphylactic shock, and his organs start shutting down. Really, he needs it. Now.
Look, the Benadryl’s working for your son. Thank goodness! Did he have anything unusual to eat? Oh yeah, it really is a bother to check those ingredients, especially on something with sooooo many different ones, like that granola bar you picked up at the concession stand right before the flight. Maybe you should take a couple of my Benadryl tablets along with you, just in case that pesky nut allergy interferes with your laid back style. Just in case. Also, if you get around to it, maybe, just maybe pick up a couple of Epi-Pens for yourself. I know it’s not fun to be the “allergy kid,” but it’s a lot better to be the living allergy kid. I promise. Your kid deserves it.